Friday, November 13, 2009

fuckkkk you.

Okay.

All of you fucking idiots who decide to attack me, i'd love to tell you that im tougher than you. and that i can handle all of this on my own. and that your words dont hurt me.

i'd love to say that every morning when i wake up, i put on a suite of armor that protects me from all the nasty words and judging stares you are going to throw at me that day.

and i'd love to say that when you say something to me, that causes my heart to fucking drop and stretch and tear, that im going to be able to say something so clever and mean back that you are going to want to take it back.

but i cant fucking do that.

it hurts.

and i dont care who you are, or how much i SHOULD care about what you think of me, its going to hurt.

im trying my best.

and i already know thats not good enough, i dont need you to tell me.

you think i dont know im a walking mistake? and that i hurt people? and dont always do the right thing? dont you know that shit like that keeps me awake at night?

please, just cut me some slack.

im only held together by so much, and i've worked so hard at getting those pieces of me to stay together. But they're barely hanging on right now. and when stuff people say cut into me like that, it just tears up all i have left. and i fall apart.

No comments:

Post a Comment